Mind ramblings..

Mind No. 1: Did you know?

Mind No. 2: What?

M1: She screwed up again. This time in a bigger way, you know.

M2: Oh mannn, Really? Why does she keep doing that?

M1: Well, some people are meant for making mistakes. They cant go on with life if there is no excitement, some drama, tragedy and spice.

M2: Yeah, may be you are right! She is like that. But hows she now anyway?

M1: You know her! Holding tight.. Whether its the reason for the mess or the reason for her existence!

M2: That sounds painful.

M1: I bet it is. First deal with the mess you created. Then deal with the impacted ones. Then deal with their tantrums. Then deal with your guilt. Then deal with their disappointment. Then deal with your loneliness. Then deal with their disconnectedness. Then deal with your disconnectedness. Then deal with their stubbornness. Then deal with your agony. Then deal with their anger. Then deal with your anger. Then deal with the emptiness and void in relationships. And while dealing with all of this deal with the splurge of emotions running inside you for the reason of the mess. And eventually deal with standing alone day in day out.

M2: Mann.. That’s something. But do you think she will survive out of it?

M1: What do you mean?

M2: Like, will she be herself again? Will she ever take spontaneous, reckless and impulsive decisions again? Will she give her 110% in any relationship again?

M1: Don’t know ya! No idea as of now. She may or she may not. But she certainly lost her faith in love by many levels.

M2: How can you say that? She messed up.. She screwed it all up.. How does she get to be the one who says I have lost my faith in love?

M1: Well all I mean to say is, She has had enough of love and its after effects.. She may find her solace in something else but not love for sure. I think by now she totally believes that the choice of freedom costs a lot and that she is not ready for that price.

M2: I don’t know what to say. Understanding her is too complicated.

M1: Hahaha, you are not the first one to say that. Don’t even try understanding her. Let her be.

M2: You mean no matter how much pain she gives to others. She still gets to be the one who throws tantrums and has expectations and expects freedom and love.

M1: Well frankly, Yes! That’s how she is and that’s how she will always be.

M2: I am glad. At least that’s not changed in her.

M1: Yeah Man, Really.

M2: Do you think everything will be alright and rocking for her ever again?

M1: Knowing her and her relationships, I strongly think it will all be alright. But knowing the new changes in her, her thoughts, her beliefs and her relationships, I doubt my earlier belief a bit.

M2: Why do you say that?

M1: She was broken before. She is broken again. Earlier when she was broken she had people of her own and a place of her own. Now she doesn’t. Now she completely believes that life’s going to be boring, uninteresting and relationships are going to be disconnected & dented from now on.

M2: You mean she has lost faith in miracles and specially in her decisions.

M1: You got it.

M2: That’s scary. I worry now.

M1: Don’t you worry, you know our girl. She will somehow get everything and everyone on track.

M2: Well yeah, that she will.

M1: I just want her to start loving herself again and move on.

M2: So you think she hasn’t moved on yet?

M1: I don’t think so. But she is trying. The deeper you are in it, the slower you come out of it.

M2: That’s true. I just hope she moves on but doesn’t really move on.

M1: What’s that supposed to mean?

M2: Like move on from where she is supposed to. But not move on from her own self and others.

M1: Hmm, now I get it. You got a point there.

M2: Yeah, I just hope she pulls it off correctly.

M1: You worry again, I told you somehow someday she will.

M2: Yeah, but it cant be too late you know. She has to survive her spontaneous, impulsive nature tied to a 110% lover till then.

M1: Well it sounds a bit difficult but you never know when it comes to her!

M2: Hope she finds the light again….

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s